learn

back at it again-maybe, and the keys to life.

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Keys

How’s that for a commitment?  Not too forceful, and probably not anything anyone would believe but myself. I have had a great many days to figure out just how I want to live my life, and that’s a good thing because while thinking about it I WAS living my life.

I’ve got it down to a few simple goals, simple in that they are all things that I can control should I choose to.  Not simple at all to do.  That takes discipline.  I never like that word. Discipline. Sounds too hard. Discipline is what great athletes have, you know, the ones that make it, and say they practiced everyday of their lives since they could walk.  Yuck!  I would be too bored to have done that.

But now, in my wisdom, I understand that discipline is just another way of saying do what you like, often, and always, and don’t stray. It means do all the things that you need to do to reach or achieve your goal. It means line up everything in favor of what you want.  It means focus.  Focus hard.  It also means filter.  You have to filter out the distractions.  Whether these distractions are internal, as in your mind – your thoughts, or external as in everything and everyone in the whole dang world.  Filtering and focus are both at your disposal, and they are the best f*cking tools you’ll every know.

Oh don’t forget belief, self-confidence.  You have to, have to, believe that you can do whatever it is you want.  I don’t care one bit if it is a realistic goal or not.  Judging your goal is a major distraction.  Don’t do it…and never let anyone else do it (judge your goal) for you!

Discipline, focus, filter and believe. The keys to everything.

Please add any other keys in the comment section below.

It’s a great day!  Enjoy.

It’s the moments that matter

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Last week we were driving to do normal errands.  It was the first real storm of the winter the roads looked something like the photo below.

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We were driving a little fast for my liking, but I have been called a back seat driver so I took this opportunity to just be quiet.  I notice a SUV was baring down on us but we could not pull over a lane because another car was in the way.  Any way I was getting nervous and I said something like ” it’s kind of slippery.”   As I said that I looked in the mirror and the SUV following us was in a total spin out.  He seemed to not hit anything but the next car, a sedan, also spun out and took a direct hit into the concrete medium.

No traffic continued forward for a while, we are not sure what happened, but what I do know is the we easily could have be in the sedan behind the SUV.  That very well could have been our accident, except for the moments that got us where we were.  A displacement of 20 seconds total.  So if you find yourself wasting or rushing a few seconds here or there, in the course of your lifetime it does matter.  You’ll never know how much it matters until its right in front of your face.

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Cheers!

I repeat.

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Old habits die hard.

Old belief are nearly impossible to kill.

I am moving to a different journey.   And it isn’t because I have succeeded at this journey, it’s because of what I have learned over the course of trying to de-clutter.   You see it’s not the clutter that is causes the problem, it is my mind.  NO matter what problem you see in your life, if you can identify it and recognize it, then you already have everything needed to fix it.

I have spent the last two years doing everything in my power, ( at least I thought I was)  to change my life.

Only the other day I looked around and saw a “repeat” of everything I wanted to change and all that I wanted to leave behind.  My new small house, within a a 9 month period, has acquired all characteristics that I didn’t like about our old house.  Why is that?

This is why; and I want you to pay close attention –It’s my mind.  It’s my thoughts.  It is my beliefs.  I fall into the same old patterns.  I am was on a replay loop. So of course everything would be the same, there was no chance of it ever changing. No chance whatsoever.

My symptoms:  procrastination, lack of focus, unwillingness to let go, believing that another day it will be different, and making excuses.

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I will tell you I have succeeded in some areas.  I have conquered any weight issues I used to have, and I am closer than ever to resolving the issues with my family of origin.  So now is the time I need to work on me.

My recent readings have helped me to clearly see this and so I have an understanding of what I need to do.  These are the book so far that have made a significant impact:

Love yourself, like your life depends on it.

Super Brain

You Can Heal Your Life

In addition to these I am reading the Power of Now and Tao the Ching

I am giving you these books as insight into my current journey.   I now know I have to seriously change my auto- pilot repetitive thought patterns in order to be happy and free.   And if you find yourself in the same boat, you might want to pick one of these books up and read.  I found them inspiring and helpful.

I have to concentrate on me.  All else will follow.

As always Cheers!

“atta girl”

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Self sabotage.   Ever hear of it?   It’s when we know better, and yet we continue to follow ideas, thoughts and actions that will not get us where we want to be.

Why do we do this? I have no clue, but I am willing to try to figure it out.  So here are my guesses:

1. We are comfortable in habit.

2. We are afraid of failure.

3. We are lazy

4. We have no will power.

5. We have low expectations.

6. We are afraid of change.

7. We doubt our abilities.

Those are the top seven reasons that just popped in my head.  You may have come up with different reasons.  (I would love to hear from you in the comments)

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Now, I want to take those same reasons and listen to them as if a child was telling me why they could never ride a two-wheeler.

My reaction to the child’s reasons was simple and automatic. I effortlessly and instantly offered encouragement.  I quickly reassured the child that there was no harm in trying.  I let him/her know the worst that could happen isn’t that bad, and that she could always try again.

So why is it as adults we (I) fail to encourage ourselves?  I don’t have the answers, nothing is popping into my head.

As a matter of fact, I must take this little post and apply it to myself.   It’s time to encourage myself.   Wish me well.  Cheers to all of you out there who are trying to break out of your existing patterns.

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Tip: Treat yourself like you care about yourself.

Inspiration: “Your life does not get better by chance, it gets better by change.” –Jim Rohn

One-day one-thing: I am going to paint or draw  something today.

Assholes clutter a good life

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Do you know how many assholes clutter this world?

Here’s the thing, we are supposed to take the high ground and let it go.  Let it be, etc, but you know what?  The assholes aren’t getting the message this way.

I am sure you have read about the “everyone gets a ribbon” syndrome that is plaguing American youth. Well this same idea, of not telling someone they suck, applies to assholes, jerks and rude people.

We ignore them. We take the high ground.  As a result they see no negative repercussions for their rude inconsiderate behavior. They think what they are doing is acceptable, a-okay, so they continue.  Most of these people have no person close enough to them who will say , “Hey knock it off, you’re being an asshole.”…..They live in this bubble of self- absorption, only thinking about their own needs as a primary focus of each and every waking moment.

So here is the question:  Do you call them out, or let them continue?  You know if they continue they will pass it on to their off-spring, thus we are promoting the trait.  Or do you protect your own well-being and peace of mind? In other words, let them live in their pathetic asshole lives and cut them out of your circles, and move on. ( thus living in a bubble of your own creation)

Yep, everyone knows an asshole, has seen an asshole, and encounters them frequently.  From what I see there appears to be a growing number of these characters around.  Are we somewhat to blame for allowing  them to exist?  Has our choice not to get “involved”with their low-life behavior embolden them?  Are we now “Asshole-Enablers?”  (AE groups starting at a church near you)

I see both sides of this coin.  I know I want a peaceful and kind life, but can I have that when I am not doing my part to squelch the jerk?  When I look the other way, am I being selfish by helping only myself and not society as a whole?

It’s like that show on T.V. calledWhat would you do?  Notoriously they have actors acting very badly, and they wait to see if anyone (any civilian in the area), will speak up.  Audiences are joyful, even tearful,  when someone stands up to the asshole and conversely the audience is totally disgusted when the people look the other way.

I believe it takes a village to raise a community, but those days appear to be gone for the most part.

I am positive I don’t have the answer here.  I am working on this one because I think we as a people have to start playing an active role in what we see and what we deem as acceptable in our communities and in our lives.  Sadly I am not yet ready to play in the mud, but some days I get real close.

Please let me know your thoughts on this one, I am very interested in all points of view.

Better today

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Today I learned from the other day and simply removed myself from a conversation of which I didn’t want to participate in, and I am proud of myself.

It was so easy to just change the subject, get ignored, and slowly move away.  The conversation wasn’t a feel good conversation, and even though I have my own opinions on just about everything I just wanted a more positive day for myself.  So I got it.

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There you have it, an example of taking control of my environment.   I am still learning, so I know there is hope for you too.

Happy Father’s Day all you dads, keep being awesome!

Oh it’s Sunday so I shouldn’t be posting – got to go!  Cheers!

I let myself down

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I have to fess up today I did something that I have tried to stop doing…..getting into conversations that make me says things just to be nice, rather then just disagreeing and standing my ground or walking away.

I would categorize this as social clutter, when you are in a social setting, and there is no easy or graceful way out.  But that is twisted thinking, because there is always a way out.  You (meaning me) just has to either speak up, change the subject or walk away.  I felt dirty most the day because I slipped.

I mean seriously, I slipped bad…..I didn’t say much, yet I said too much of the wrong things.  Good thing it was a casual conversation, and nothing will come out of it except my re-learning the lesson to be true to myself, and take every step to create the world in which I want to spend my time.

I have said the following to myself lately and I like it a lot……”My world is what I make it at every moment.”  This is a challenge, but it’s empowering  to tune out the social clutter.  Just eliminate it from your thoughts.  It doesn’t go away.  No,  it’s out there poisoning other minds and upsetting various people, but you do not have to give it a home in you head.  Do not invite it in.

Remember you are what you think, not what you eat, that’s your body.  But you, your soul, is what you think and what you believe.  We have control over this…..even though it is difficult for sure, we still choose.

Feed your brain only good content…..Right now I am listening to classical music in the car, for a change.  I don’t even know who’s music I am taking  in but it’s very relaxing, and has emotion, and it is ever so beautiful.  I imagine all the individuals who worked at learning their instruments, practiced their art for hours, years, and then came together making it possible for me to hear their work while I drive in my dog van.  That is freakin’ awesome.

I feel lucky in traffic, because my car sounds wonderful like a loud sound track you might hear while at a movie.  My car becomes a safe-pod protected from the bitterness and negativity that is prevalent in the air of our current society.  At least that is how I interpret it.  Plus I even think my dogs like it.

So there you have it, we all slip up once in awhile.  Recognize and move on.

Peace, it takes practice.

Tip: Decide how you want to live and live it.

Inspiration: “ The whole point of being alive is to evolve into the complete person you were intended to be.” ~Oprah Winfrey

One-day one-thing: Listen, decide, and filter.