listen

year end rambling….

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I’ve been pondering, yes more than usual, and I think that I am going to throw some of my thoughts out there.  No order, no goal.

I’m sick and tired of the economy.  And seeing as I am part of it, I’m going on strike.  For the year 2017 I will only buy necessities like food and toilet paper. And of course home repairs, car repairs, and vet bills…..but you get the idea.  F-them.

About social media, yeah it sucks.  It time sucks and it can be a wasteful distraction from better things.  I mean seriously, you’d feel one hundred times better if you took a nap rather than spend an hour on Facebook. Cutting back, but not cutting out.

And regarding Donald, I dont want to hear what he tweeted.  Until a story is actually news worthy, I’m tuning the Donald out.  Can I tell you something? When I hear his name my stomach literally turns.  He, and the mention of him, makes me physically sick.

I will support issue that are dear to my heart.  Mother Theresa once said,

“I was once asked why I don’t participate in anti-war demonstrations. I said that I will never do that, but as soon as you have a pro-peace rally, I’ll be there.”

I never understood it until this year.  It’s that mentality that I have to carry to get through this f-up world.  War and social issues are complicated and there is just way too much negativity.  My body can’t take any additional turmoil.  So I hope this year, to support some of the most simplest causes protecting human rights, animal rights and our environment.

You do know I am extremely liberal.  And by the way, I am proud of that.

I made a list to live by, for my daily grind….it’s a bit over reaching.   I can’t find it now. Shit.  I forget everything.  It was things to do everyday.  Making life habits.  Now I have to think it all up again.

  1. read
  2. give something
  3. do art
  4. play with dogs
  5. write something
  6. I cant remember… probably yoga….I’ve been meaning to take that up for years.

Anyway you get the idea.  I just can’t waste another year filling my head with all the crap in the world that I can not control.

Those are my thoughts for now. Just ramblings …. I hope to be writing better stuff real soon…..Carry on and cheers!

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Mexican Squirt, listen and stop

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listen

Around the corner from where I live there is this Mexican Grocery store.  And right now I am enjoying a Mexican Squirt.  That’s Squirt made with pure cane sugar.  No high-fructose corn syrup in it and it is delicious.   I enjoyed being in the market.  The store clerk was friendly, ask me if it was my first time there, it wasn’t.  He was super kind.

They sell all types of peppers, homemade salsa, they even prepare fresh tacos during lunch hour, and they also sell cacti.  How do you even prepare cactus? I don’t know, but while I was there I felt like I was worlds away. Away from the normal unrelenting drone of this American life.  Yet, I was less than one mile from my house.

The point here is – I think I am suffering from too much.  Too much of everything.  Seeing too much, hearing too much.  Owning too much, and feeling too much.  Thinking too much.  Worrying too much.  I am officially on overload.

I need to shut it all off.  I need to shut it all down.  I need to try not to notice.  I need to listen.

I need to listen to that voice inside that has been screaming at me – STOP!

So today I stop.  I am really going to stop tomorrow,  I don’t know exactly what I will do, but it wont require me to worry, to think, or to rush here or there.

I am officially in the stop mode.  I don’t care if I don’t know how to be  a miracle worker right now…..I am stop mode.  If I don’t learn how to meditate this week, so what?

I already feel better just saying I am in “stop mode.”  Seems silly but it appears to be helping me.

I hope you can STOP also…..it’s awesome and I just started a few minutes ago. I guess it doesn’t take 40 day to stop.

Cheers!

Better today

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Today I learned from the other day and simply removed myself from a conversation of which I didn’t want to participate in, and I am proud of myself.

It was so easy to just change the subject, get ignored, and slowly move away.  The conversation wasn’t a feel good conversation, and even though I have my own opinions on just about everything I just wanted a more positive day for myself.  So I got it.

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There you have it, an example of taking control of my environment.   I am still learning, so I know there is hope for you too.

Happy Father’s Day all you dads, keep being awesome!

Oh it’s Sunday so I shouldn’t be posting – got to go!  Cheers!

I let myself down

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I have to fess up today I did something that I have tried to stop doing…..getting into conversations that make me says things just to be nice, rather then just disagreeing and standing my ground or walking away.

I would categorize this as social clutter, when you are in a social setting, and there is no easy or graceful way out.  But that is twisted thinking, because there is always a way out.  You (meaning me) just has to either speak up, change the subject or walk away.  I felt dirty most the day because I slipped.

I mean seriously, I slipped bad…..I didn’t say much, yet I said too much of the wrong things.  Good thing it was a casual conversation, and nothing will come out of it except my re-learning the lesson to be true to myself, and take every step to create the world in which I want to spend my time.

I have said the following to myself lately and I like it a lot……”My world is what I make it at every moment.”  This is a challenge, but it’s empowering  to tune out the social clutter.  Just eliminate it from your thoughts.  It doesn’t go away.  No,  it’s out there poisoning other minds and upsetting various people, but you do not have to give it a home in you head.  Do not invite it in.

Remember you are what you think, not what you eat, that’s your body.  But you, your soul, is what you think and what you believe.  We have control over this…..even though it is difficult for sure, we still choose.

Feed your brain only good content…..Right now I am listening to classical music in the car, for a change.  I don’t even know who’s music I am taking  in but it’s very relaxing, and has emotion, and it is ever so beautiful.  I imagine all the individuals who worked at learning their instruments, practiced their art for hours, years, and then came together making it possible for me to hear their work while I drive in my dog van.  That is freakin’ awesome.

I feel lucky in traffic, because my car sounds wonderful like a loud sound track you might hear while at a movie.  My car becomes a safe-pod protected from the bitterness and negativity that is prevalent in the air of our current society.  At least that is how I interpret it.  Plus I even think my dogs like it.

So there you have it, we all slip up once in awhile.  Recognize and move on.

Peace, it takes practice.

Tip: Decide how you want to live and live it.

Inspiration: “ The whole point of being alive is to evolve into the complete person you were intended to be.” ~Oprah Winfrey

One-day one-thing: Listen, decide, and filter.

What do we really know???

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Recently, more than once, I have known things before I actually saw them in real life.

Pretty weird.  But it got me to thinking, just how did that happen.  Seriously who told my brain that I would find exactly what I thought I would find, before I found it.   How did I know?

The more abstract thing is this was a physical item, a book.  Not  feeling or an event, but an actual book.  Published in 2002, today I knew would be in the local Goodwill.  I wasn’t planning to go to Goodwill, but I felt something say “go there.”  I fought that inner voice.  That is until I remembered my post from the other day saying trust your instincts.

So I blew off my trip to the office supply store as previously planned and made my way to Goodwill.

I saw a top I donated last fall, just out now because it’s a springtime top.  I still didn’t like it.  Why on earth did I ever buy that thing?  Anyway, I looked around and practiced just being  there and concentrating on all the weird stuff I was seeing.  I listened to the music playing and minded my own space.

I thought that the “book” was there.  Mind you this was only a fleeting thought in my head.  I ignored it, didn’t even look for the book.  The thought raced across my mind once again. I ignored it again.  Finally I told myself to go look for the book……it wasn’t on the side where I thought it would be.  That was the end of that.

I turned the corner and there was a 2002 edition of the Guinness World Record book.  I could hardly believe it.  It was there.

You see, when my oldest son was young I started giving him Guinness World Record books every Christmas.  I  was encouraging him to read.  Anyway, when he was in grade school he took his brand spankin’ new 2002 Guinness World Record book  to school and some kid wrecked it.  Just like that.

I’d like to find a replacement for him and that’s why I have it on my mind.  But who knew my mind could tell me when it would be at Goodwill.

So weird.   But I am here to tell you I am open to this power if there is such a thing.

Cheers.

Tip: Try to stop thinking, sing instead.  I do this in my car, it feels good.

Inspiration:”In the beginner’s mind there are many possibilities. In the expert’s mind there are few.” -Shunryu Suzuli

One-day one thing: Let go of one regret forever.

Sleepless Reality

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Everything seems possible when you can’t sleep, except of course sleeping.

No one bothers you but yourself on sleepless nights.  But the worse part for me is knowing how awful I will feel the next day.

Well, today is the next day, I have a mild headache and have a list of “must do’ errands.   Winter arrived during the night and there’s a few inches of snow covering everything, and I am sure it’s in the teens with the wind chill.

What did I learn last night?

The earliest known Great White Shark fossils are about 16 million years old

Drinking coffee after not drinking coffee for a week – is a bad idea.  Either commit to it or don’t, because it really does effect your body.  I have had three sips today, and I think that’s going to be all for me, okay one more sip, but that’s it.  Maybe the caffeine is stronger when I use my french press? Or maybe it was the Jamaican coffee, or maybe it’s because I recently switch to a 66% raw diet?  But that’s it for me, no more coffee. That last sip was extremely unsatisfying.

I found out my best friend when I cant sleep is my iPhone.  I didn’t have to get out of bed, and it took minimal effort to read, browse news, tumblr and comment on blogs.  Connect then disconnect with people who were awake, where ever.  Then I would attempt to sleep again.

Tossing and turning is the worst. I  convinced myself that laying perfectly still would be the closest thing I could do to sleep.   I did that exercise more than once.

I figured out that that guy that was on “Shark Tank” episode last night probably didn’t sleep for months after losing 200K in less than 2 minutes.  Offer to hand me a check for 600K for my company free and clear, I say, ” Hell yes  and thank you!” in a New York minute.

During my sleepless night, I decided I didn’t feel right about putting in an offer on house #6.  Needless to say, house #5 rejected our offer.  The #5 house was the best one so far, in the big picture.  We signed all the #6 papers yesterday, and I told my Husband this morning it was a no-go.  He said, ” No problem, we’ll trust your instinct, there will be more houses.”   Was it instinct or exhaustion? No one knows.

Which brings me to this conclusion: no one knows anything.  We only think we know.  We act like we know.  We speak like we know and we listen to others like they may know.

We don’t, they don’t, but we all try to varying degrees to “know.”  Give “not-knowing” a try today.  It’s kind of fun.

Cheers!

Tip: Question yourself.

Inspiration:” We are now at a point in time when the ability to receive, utilize, store, transform and trasmit data — the lowest cognitive form — has expanded literally beyond comprehension. Understanding and wisdom are largely forgotten as we struggle under an avalanche of data and information.” – Dee Hock

One-day one-thing: Errands, as simple as that.

Everyone struggles.

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I woke early, did yoga, froze at the dog park and then made my way to the office.  The picture below is what I did when I first got to the office today.   I am sending it to my son in Boston, who won’t be home on Turkey day.  I hope think it will make him laugh happy.

Note to my son.

Then I ate lunch.  Well not really, because I graze.  I eat a little for a while then stop.  Today it was the veggie burrito bowl, without the slimy vegetables.  A meatless dip of sorts;  black beans, guacamole, rice, lettuce, a little white cheese, hot salsa  and chips.  Yum.

It’s good (most of the time) to be your own boss.   I get my work done when I know it has to be completed.  Sometimes I work really long hours, other times I have the luxury to do as I please.  Today is one of those days.

Earlier while at the dog park this chilly morning I had the pleasure of speaking to a woman whose husband is an investment banker.  She explained to me how tough the economy has been on his investment firm and how that they personally have had to cut back on their vacations.  She let me know they lived in the most expensive neighborhood in my town.  It was nice to hear this point of view.

I toyed with the idea of telling her that actually we lost our home and were living in my mother’s house, but I think that may have made her feel like a total jerk.  So I just listened.  She went on to tell me that she hoped that her children would learn something from their hardship.  Their “hardship” being that they weren’t going on as many vacation this year as in past years.  Her kids are 8, 10, and 13.

Bora Bora

On Wednesday morning at the dog park, I spoke to a young man who just left the Marines.  For some reason, I was very nosy.  I kept asking him questions.  I wanted to know what it was like, what he did there, how it effected him, and how he was adjusting back in the states.  I apologized and told him, “I’m so sorry. I don’t mean to interrogate you, like this is any of my business.”  He responded, ” No, really it’s okay, talking to people like this really helps.”

He was a sharp shooter.  He told me that every single day he would see suicide bombings, mostly children blowing themselves up, because, he said, “they believe in Allah.”   He told me that news never reaches the states, and there’s so much more.  He also told me about getting shot from friendly fire.  It was a bullet  from a  .50 Browning machine gun.  He went on to explain all about the BrowningMG and its bullet size.  Then promptly he dropped the topic of his injury.

Far left .50 Browning machine gun bullet

So I met two new friends.  I was open to both of them.  Their stories enriched my life in some manner.  I can feel judgement is trying to find it’s way into my head, but I am not going to let it in.  I am not going to try to figure out anything I heard, anymore than my either of my dogs would try to figure it out.

I played at the park with people who were there.  And those moments are gone.  Only now exists.

And right now, I am thankful, very very thankful.

Happy Friday.

Tip: Listen and learn, try to leave judgement out of the equation.

Inspiration: “The biggest mental roadblocks that you will ever have to overcome are those represented by your self-limiting beliefs.”~ Brian Tracy

One-day one-thing: Sort your linens, some towels are ready to become rags.