I am not what I own

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Which is good.  Because I don’t want to be a bunch of old crap in a storage unit, or and minivan with a crack windshield, even though I love that van.  ( stigma= soccer mom car – but I was a soccer mom )  I am about to break 100,000 miles on the Odyssey, and all those trips represent my family’s travel only.  Kind of sentimental, or maybe only mental, it makes no difference.  Now I use it for my dogs and to my transport of children to and from college.  I’d like to convert it to a camper some day. (hey Pimp-My_Ride pick me)  It’s so useful I will own until the day it dies.

In any case, I confess when I was younger I was into everything materialistic.  Brands and designers, oh yeah.   Not that I thought it made me better, just that I thought is was better to have.  This is quite embarrassing to me now, but most my gifts (from my husband only)  were from Tiffany & Co.   I saved all the boxes.  Those are somewhere inside another box, God-only-knows where.  The beautiful nuggets that were inside those blue boxes are locked in a safe and rarely come out to play.  Which makes it all the more ridiculous.

I love those gifts.  They were given to me with love and that’s what makes them special.  However one of my most treasured gifts is a rock that has “I love you” written on it with chalk.  It was handed to me while having a dinner picnic at the beach.   It’s from one of my children, they don’t remember, and I don’t remember which one, so my mind lets me believe  it ‘s from all of them.

And I don’t own that rock, it belongs to the earth, but I choose to own the sentiment.   Though all my chaos, I have made it a top priority to preserve that rock.  Protecting it for years, maybe as many as 11 years, because I don’t want the chalk to wear off.   I don’t want to ever lose that moment, even though the moment is long gone.

There is no easy way to do this.  People  have tried to protect the famous chalk words of Premier Wen Jiabao,” “distress rejuvenates a nation.” He wrote this while was pointing out to high-schoolers,  that despite all of the hardship that the Wenchuan earthquake had brought to the students, their families, and the people of Sichuan, it wasn’t the end of the world.  They put glass over the words on the chalkboard, which is still in the school.

"distress rejuvenates a nation"

My point, do I have one?  Yeah I have one.  We are not what we own.  We are nothing but what we think or believe at any moment.  If we choose to feel and think  hatred and venom then that is what we are.  If we choose to think/ live with love and compassion then that is what we are.

Make no mistake, we forever adapting fluid beings that can change moment by moment.  When someone is spewing hate in your direction, the first response is fight or flight.  Too often we think we can win by fighting, when in reality we win by simply walking away and letting it go.

And remember it’s no crime to experience an wide spectrum of emotions, we have emotions for our own protection.  Don’t beat yourself up if you get angry, but do take the time to examine and figure out how to get un-angry.

You are never going to be the car you drive, no matter how spectacular (or crappy) you think it is.  It’s not who you are.


Tip: Pick what you want to be and try your hardest to be that as often as possible.

Inspiration: “Love and kindness are never wasted. They always make a difference. They bless the one who receives them, and they bless you, the giver.”- Barbara De Angelis

One-day one-thing: When stress hits you today, for one minute mentally imagine yourself somewhere peaceful. Repeat as needed.

(I am so writing this for myself)

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